CEO: HRD?.....its me
Me: Hi
CEO: I mean....what the f*** is going on?
Me: Can I have a clue? A starter for ten?
CEO: This f***ing thing you sent me. I mean....its just f***ing wrong. I mean....theres only a few days to go....and who is in control of this....I'm completely on edge....for f***s sake
Me: Ok......which bit is wrong?
CEO: Well for a start blankety blanks is on the list and they shouldn't be on it. They've been taken off...I mean, do we know who we are f***ing making redundant or not?
Me: Ah, when I had the conversation this week they were on the list. I spoke to the Manager this morning and they didn't say anything.
CEO: Well they are not on the f***ing list anymore. Why the f*** don't you know? Who's not talking to you? Thats the f***ing problem! I mean if that f***ing bit is wrong, what else is f***ing wrong? If this is f***ed up I will be completely f***ed off. I'm warning you in advance.
Me: Sure, well I was pretty sure that there were no changes, but obviously there are. Do you know who agreed the change? Who authorised it?
CEO: Well I did of course!!
Me: Ya....OK....and ....ummmm......so...ummm do you know who could possibly have told me about it?
CEO: (pauses for at least a minute)...............................................................................................OK, well just make sure you are f***ing well on top of it .....OK? (slams phone down)
