This weekend is a holiday weekend in the UK and I’ll be returning home to the place where I grew up. It’s remiss of me that I haven’t been back to the fold for a year and it started me thinking about the hopes and dreams I had as a child
Kid: Mum, Dad. We’ve been talking at school about jobs and I made a choice
Mum: Ohh really son? What is it?
Kid: I know what I want to be when I’m a big boy!
Dad: Hey, good man. Come on little fella, tell me what it is? Spaceman? Racing Driver? Footballer?
Mum:…..Doctor, Lawyer?
Kid: smugly Nope. I want to be……………..an HR Director!
Mum:……………………………………………………..
Dad:………………………………………………………
Fish (in tank on the side): ………………………………..
Mum: Ohh my God, what will the neighbours say………
Dad:………,.ok little man……its good you’re exploring options…..options are good, we all need to look and think and rule out the completely f***ing stupid, but I don’t think you need to rush into anything, make any decisions, you’ve got the whole life ahead of you…….let's not be rash………
Mum: What will the family say……..
Dad:….so tell me……..what….I mean how….I mean WHY?
Kid: Well I like dreaming up ideas and special worlds and places that only I can understand and everyone else says are just silly……..
Mum: What will the kids in the park say………
Dad: Will you shut up! Uhuh go on son…..
Kid: I like make believe, pretending I’m a big strong, important and powerful man who everyone likes and wants to be friends with….....
Dad: Yup
Kid: I like painting by numbers, colouring in and I always have the most-tidiest pencil case in all of the school………
Dad:………………..
Kid: And I’m rubbish at maths unless I use my fingers and toes…….
Mum: I’m leaving town……………
Kid: So the teacher said it was the absolute, most perfect job she could think of in the whole wide world for me…….
Dad: ….right…..umm….be there’s no rush, there are lots of good jobs out there, undertaker……taxidermist…….pest controller…….no need to jump right in and decide now
Mum: I’m feeling faint……
Kid: But Dad, I leave Uni in the summer, what am I going to do then?
Mum: ***thud***
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1 comment:
Lol! oh wow- how hilarious...well written yet again. It's an interesting way to explore the naivety and ultimate cynicism associated with this profession. I've only been at it two years and already it's leaving a bitter taste in my mouth....
I dunno how my mom does it...
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